Self love.

Everyone have the goodness and badness inside our soul. Nobody is truly 100% good and vice versa. So how did we sometime express our emotion when we felt so much negativity? of course our bad attitude that we hide inside our soul (no matter how innocent and kind you are) - it will crawl out from your soul and express it. And that is what we call "mad".

Why do I bring out this topic on my blog? not that I should have talk more about fashion. But I like to getting more personal, when posting something on my blog. About how I felt these days, weeks, months and years. Somehow I like to write a story about myself and what I am going through to relieve and satisfy myself.

Back to the topic "Expression". When you are mad, how do you hold it up so far? are u the type of person who like to keep it to yourself, getting away, getting alone, express to the person or directly express how you felt - confront? or you will get mad and then forget it or even you will remember it for the rest of your life? For myself, I like to be alone for a while and then i will confront it later on. Because when we are mad, we can't control what is on our mind and what is right or wrong. And you will just blame it into one thing, or this selfish emotion came out from our soul and we will think that we are always right. Even though I do try to control to be alone, sometimes I am uncontrollable and speak whats on my mind right or wrong which ended up hurting people feeling. So yes, I still have lots of rooms for improvement.

Expressing my thought on the blog help ease my mind of holding up everything. The feeling of Disappointment and getting mad at ourselves or even the feeling of powerless can happen anytime at your lowest point of life. Now i do feel that i am reaching to the age of mid quarter life crisis, when we are forced to choose our path and decide what we are going to do for our career. And mostly we are pushed to grown up and learn that not everything can go smoothly as planned. Cause we may stumble upon rocks, we are tested - are we capable of going through this rocky road, are we ready to let go something that you treasure, do we have the hearts to do it all? can we really control our emotion of how the image of Adult should be?

But back to my point, there is nobody perfect -
And what we can do is learning and growing, to become a better person than we used to be.
Take it slowly, don't push yourself so hard and end it up hating yourself instead of self love.
Aren't we human? Aren't we allow to make mistake? Aren't we allow to learn?

This post should be a self reminder that we shouldn't let we hate ourselves for being in a way that we shouldn't be. but as a reminder that we promise to grow and learn during this hardship process that we are going through (close your ears from people around you that share lots of negativity about you) and focus on loving yourself - seeing the positivity.

 

All pictures are taken by Cinthy kwok (click on the link)

What i wore?

Dress: Editors market

Outer: Shop at velvet

Heels: Editors market

Beret: F21

Bag: Topshop

Thank you for listening to all my chit chat and visiting my blog.

Till next time !

Veronyca Sufry

xoxo

Indecisive thought

It's never to late to greet happy new year 2018, right? even I am 5 months late for updating my blog.

This time I won't list down any resolution but I will push myself towards the better me instead of getting skinny. I do blogging when I feel like I want to share some of my deep feeling through words, not just for review or showing how passionate I am with fashion. And now it is a perfect time for me to share some of my deep thought during the last few months.

One month from now, I will be twenty five years old - and to be honest, I am still lost in this complicated mind. What do I want? Who I want to be? What can I do? Am I in the right path? Is this what I want? The future seems scary but what should I do? Am I ready for this?. Growing old doesn't mean I know what I want to be.. And taking a leap seems scary even people often say.. it is your time to not be in the comfort zone. Time doesn't repeat, you can't go back to the past. The only thing I am sure about is, I have to travel & save up & do my bucket list (watching concert). I know I am not that typical 25, that you expect that I am the adult and I know much more than the kids just like what I imagine when I am still a kid/teenager. But it is proven that I am very wrong..

Another things that bother me is people perspective of judging. It's kinda hard for me to accept, if what people thought of me is wrong. I know it very well again now, wherever you go - we will always be judge even what we do is right. There is no right or wrong. People judge. Come on Veronyca you can do it, let it be and only you who know it is right and try to take it positively instead sucking myself to negativity.

Hairstyle, I cut my hair shorter and loving it. Still into grey and purple but I figure it is better to save my Money for something more useful and I am kinda like my current hair too. As dualipa style is my inspiration aww and I'm liking her hairstyle and fashion and music.

I am struggling with beauty product, really its hard for me to find a proper skin care that will suit my skin. removing blemish and acne scar, oh my god. I have committed and my a promise to myself, if I ever find a skincare that can make my face back to normal - I am gonna keep promoting it and do my very honest review. My skin type is combination, more to oily. And the ordinary is not suitable for me.. which is sad and it makes my skin breakout.

Early marriage is not my thing. I won't settle till I get what I want and be successful (more money). I will never be a housewife - I just can't .. unless I am marrying a prince lol. Cause having you own money is better, you save and you spend on what you want, instead of asking your husband to pay for everything you want (it's not good). I am learning a lot from my boyfriend of who taught me how to be independent women and a women with career & goal.

Fashion, some people think I am weird in my choice of outfit but I am not. The only thing that keep me lively in this city and working is my passion in fashion and photography. I am more active in my Instagram, and it is wonderful how this passion lead me to know more about people who share the same passion as me and the way we wore and style our fashion is just free. I get to know wonderful people and learning more about people with no age limit. And getting older will not stop me for exploring and styling my kind of own fashion - I will keep sharing my passion and yes I am working on my youtube video very soon (my first lookbook video) with the help of my friend Cinthy Kwok. Yuhuuuu.. ok I will I will let you guys know once its up !

People, I am still grateful of all the people around me and still stay with me through up and down of my twenties. And personally, I never forget the people (my close friend) that who makes me feel free and how to be my real self even in my worst mood or happy. You guys are the best, in your twenties - it is really hard to find a true friend. And I am grateful I have them.

Me and Jessy Xu

Crossing the road, ok I am afraid of crossing the road alone. Before reaching 25, I will share my current lookbook ootd shot with my talented friend Bryan Jonathan ! And THANKS to him, I got to try something new like our current shot with the background of our hometown "Medan". People who look at us will think.. we are crazy. Are they not afraid of getting rob? and if we actually take care of our hometown, everything is not scary as it seems and our crime rates will not as high as now. Walking the streets in our hometown even scare us, and all of us prefer using grab/taxi to anywhere instead of walking down the pedestrian path. If you look at around, some corner of our city is not that slack and here is the shot that I get with the background of our city "Medan". (fyi: it is so hard to get a shot in the zebra cross, red traffic light - these people don't care and just go straight pass the traffic.."speechless"). ok, here it is:

What I wear

Top: Monki

Skirt: Pomelo Fashion

Bag: Pomelo Fashion

Blazer: KelnTai

Shoes: Vans

All photos credit to my talented friend Joe >>> follow him on instagram@joeytanjaya  ! (Yes, for business inquiries, you can dm him directly). Thank you for creative ideas and taking the best ootd shot !

Till next time ! Perhaps some travel post? will see.. (off to my hectic job again).
XOXO
Veronyca Sufry